THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Alexis Gold she’s a fat Jewish shoot from the OC who has consumed way too many twinkies over the past few years. Many snack companies have gone out of business because she eats way too many bags of snacks and the companies can’t keep up with the production. This girl is a fat Jew who tries to shed anonymity by using different last names including Katrina and Goldman. No one knows her real last name so she uses all these fake last names with the hope that people won’t know who she really is. She retired from Sea World as the main walrus inside the aquarium and is now pursuing a modeling and acting career in Los Angeles. Her Instagram is @alexisgoldmusic and she has over ten thousand followers she bought in order to appear famous but no one really give a sh*t about her music. She can’t dance or sing well so she just spent money on those fake followers to act popular. Nik, do you have any advice for this big girl?
Yes, please LaserAway the Sea World logo tattoo. Sea World is a bad look these days.- nik